This post may contain affiliate or referral links, which means I may receive a commission if you purchase something using my link. It will be no extra cost to you. As always, thank you for supporting Getting Fit Fab.
#mc_embed_signup{background:#fff; clear:left; font:14px Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif; }
/* Add your own MailChimp form style overrides in your site stylesheet or in this style block.
We recommend moving this block and the preceding CSS link to the HEAD of your HTML file. */
Subscribe to my mailing list
Ah, as a semi new bride, I’ve gotten this question a lot, especially after I answer the “So, when are you getting married?” or “Did you pick a date yet?”. Both questions are answered with, Summer 2016, it’s a bit vague but that is 100% fine with us. The date I picked (CA knew the date I wanted and was okay with it), is extremely important, it’s my maternal grandparents wedding Anniversary the year before my grandpa passed away they celebrated 50 wonderful years together. So, I figured it’s a bit of good luck, they went through A LOT, had 6 awesome kids (duh my mom and fav aunts/uncles), and they were all raised awesomely. Besides that, it’s a Saturday, so most people won’t have to take off more than one day to come to the wedding {if they live out of state}. It being a Saturday in the SUMMER, it also makes it more expensive, which just NO, right? Eh, we got over it pretty quick when we found our perfect venue {you can read about that here}, so venue found, price is perfect, venue is GORGEOUS, they also have our date available so all of our ducks in a row.
Us looking at venues, putting a deposit down on a venue, and gathering ideas for everything else you need for a wedding, has people giving us, “What For?”. Well this post is for those “What For?” people, and maybe they could see those questions are really not something to say to CA and myself.
Most people assume, (and assume very wrong), that our wedding is being paid for, by my parents. Don’t get me wrong, they are helping as much as possible, but that doesn’t mean it’s a free ride for us, not in the least. I am saving, and paying for our venue alone, no one is helping with paying for our venue, it’s just me. CA is paying for what he can to help us, but he’s also saving for our future house for when we move, which is a very huge deal. My mum is helping as much as she can, so far she’s gone half with my engagement party dress, gotten us favors, our Save The Dates, and E-Party Invites/Thank Yous {e-party is the engagement party…hush I’m just lazy}. She’s contributing as much as possible, and she’ll be helping me pay for a lot more things, my dad is helping with the extras as well plus he’s giving us breathing room, if something EXTRA comes up that WE didn’t think about the extra cushion will be our safety net.
So what costs the most in a wedding, the VENUE, what am I paying for? The VENUE. So that is why we choose our venue extremely quickly, gives ME more time to pay it off in payments not just a hunk of loose change. Also, which is the main point…. we got the date we WANTED, no ifs ands or buts. Certain people that ask, in a “tone” that I don’t like, I simply reply with, I’m paying for the venue myself and leave it at that.
A lot of people, don’t know or don’t pay attention, so they don’t understand… that I have extreme anxiety with anything to do with money. Like when we started planning our wedding? I was having panic and anxiety attacks daily… usually circling around “WHAT IF WE DON’T HAVE THE MONEY?!!?!?” Money doesn’t appear out of thin air, nor does it grow on this cute little tree in my backyard. It comes from working hard, saving like my life depends on it, and just save save save {some more}, and a touch of frugalness.
I’ve also heard, “Why are you getting things so early?”, well lets refer back to the above paragraph, because I SAID SO. No, really, I am buying (or my mum) little things that add up just as quick as big things do, because guess what? ALL that saving, I have a little bit of extra money, so I will be what I can NOW, so when I need it I don’t have to come up with X amount of money to buy it, that most likely? I won’t have at the time I need it.
The ONE good thing about paying for my own money, besides learning the power of money (UGH). I learned that, I have the last word, (so does CA) in anything. No one can tell me, well I AM PAYING FOR YOUR WEDDING, so you have to do what I want. HA, no I don’ttttttttttttttttt. I don’t have to do it all, alright that sounds like I am a brat, but I’m really not (Pinky Swear). I’m paying for the venue and some other things, so I have the final say on the guest list, because if I go over our magic number, I won’t have that money to pay for those people. It is quite honestly that simple, I don’t have money to pay for anyone beyond our magic number. We only have to guarantee a certain amount, and if people RSVP no, that is okay, there is no B-List for people, it’s just the A-List of people that CA & I truly want at our wedding, and that would WANT/LOVE to share our special day with us.
People that know me very well including CA, know me, and they don’t question my intentions with gathering ideas, saving my favorite links to favors, and extras. They also have told me, I don’t need to explain my self (so why am I dedicating an ENTIRE post about it?). Quite honestly, I don’t know why I am/did, but I feel a little better, because I know why I am doing what I’m doing, I also know… for SURE that as long as I plan the way I need to plan. I will not turn into a Bridezilla… which if I do turn into one.. my mom might disown me (J/K she won’t but she’ll just tell me what I’m turning into).
What was one thing that people kept saying to you while planning your wedding that irked you so bad?
We're looking at Fall 2015 for our wedding, and I'm having the same stresses about saving enough for it! We've definitely joked about eloping more than once lol
Ugh I hate when people say "why are you buying stuff/paying for stuff so early? We are getting married October 17, 2014, and we have our venue half paid for, we booked our photographer and DJ, and we bought the Save the Dates, favors, and my bridesmaids' gifts. I don't look at it as doing it "early," I see it like you do, buying little bits at a time makes it seem more affordable (we're paying the majority ourselves too) and honestly, it makes it more manageable! I'm not one of those people who can wait til the last minute…… Read more »
Oh girl, almost anyone I've talked to is telling us we should elope haha. I would I really would, but I just can't imagine it lol.
Ah thankfully another bride to be that understands me! I can't wait til last minute either, I get huge anxiety if I wait til the last minute. I like knowing that everything is getting rolling, paid for, organized and etc. If i don't have the money now I am saving links, ideas, and etc for when it all falls into place. It makes a HUGE difference when you are paying for your own wedding, like you and I are, 'cause we ain't rich, have other bills, and ya know a life LOL. It makes it harder, and doing/paying for this… Read more »
I agree about saying the last word. That's awesome that you got the date and venue that you want! more power to ya!
Kudos to starting early! I only had like 10 months to plan mine & it was nerve wrecking at some points! What irked me the most during wedding planning were people telling me I HAD to incorporate Chinese/Vietnamese traditions to our wedding. If we did that, we could have done enough for 3 separate weddings! Instead, we had a Western wedding & guess what, no one friggin' complained. We paid for it all so we didn't have to please anyone 😉
I think it's great that you're so on top of your game so early! You will have a much less stressful period of time during the last couple months before your wedding because you'll already have all of your big decisions made, and have probably chosen all of your little details as well. There is absolutely nothing wrong with starting so early, it actually tends to work out better for my clients especially when they are stressed about something – especially money. Good luck with all of your planning!
Looks like you are busy busy! I think planning a wedding early is super smart!